Friday, December 16, 2011

Literally Losing Your Buttocks



I feel I should be concerned that this person is on facebook instead of in the ER.

What it Means When You Say Literally



Haha...and then while I was trying to represent "Literally LMFAO" I found out that it's this thing with "I'm sexy and I know it"
And I am happily in ignorant bliss.

Thursday, December 15, 2011

Not Not Crush

John confessed something to me the other day.
"Quick! What is the actress's name who plays the reporter in the Hope?" (he means The Help)
"Emma Stone" (saved by Elise)

"Thank you! I certainly do not not have a crush on her."
Me to Amanda: "What a jerk I married! Boo!!" (teasingly, of course)

"Well I do not not have a crush on Hugh Jackman."
(I wish I had an iPhone)

Success!
It's about time!
Thank you witty, amiable skank!
                 (only because of the hilarious though inappropriate Easy A. It's actually a compliment.)

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Merry Holidays 2011


People Apparently Deserve Hate and Loathing

I didn't think it was possible for someone to totally and completely misunderstand something as simple as universal love.
Whoops. My bad.

I'm not going to go into the rest of what this dear friend of mine negates.
Right now I'm just blown away that someone could so adamantly believe this!
"There is no way all people deserve love and respect"?
Really?
REALLY?
Augh.
I do love this friend, despite the fact that he has gotten logic completely baffled.
But there are definite reasons I no longer have deep conversations with him.

For context, these are my comments:
"Whether something is wrong or not is not what's important. That's a personal decision of what you value as truth. Regardless of your personal definitions of "right" and "wrong" ALL people deserve love and acceptance. (That includes those who think something is wrong that you believe is right)"
on this article:

I'm Christian, unless you're gay

After his comment, I'm in no mood to accept arguments on the article. I thought it was nearly flawless. Just shut up if you disagree. Argue with someone else.

P.S. Some uplifting would be nice.

Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Procrationalize

Deciding that our school system is counter-productive to true education was a very bad move for me.
I already know how to successfully and happily procrastinate. I really did not need to perfect the art of rationalization to go along with it.
Deciding that as long as I don't fail my classes (meaning I'd have to pay the government back lots of moolah) and as long as I felt I learned something, my grades don't matter to me...that was a very bad move.

So here I sit, lovingly working on homework, then I realize I completely forgot about a huge part of the portfolio due tomorrow.

And I don't care.

But I should.

But I don't.

Also, I hope that getting into the English program will give me a little ego popping. Yes, I said I hope my ego pops. But hey, I'd like to see you not have a fat head when every time you turn in your first draft written at 10pm the night before it was due you get an shining bright A.
Yes. Every time.
I think the last time I got anything less than glowing remarks on something like that was in High School.
My first year in High School.
(that teacher and I didn't get along)

It's ridiculous. When I can pull off an A with my eyes closed and without really caring much about the assignment, and with avoiding every possible bit of work...
Yep. I am way too full of myself.

So, once again, I am hoping that being an English major in English major classes will change that. Then I can be on the same plane as people who also get A's without trying. Because that means I'll actually have to try.

Wouldn't that be nice?

Or maybe it will just make the perfectionist in me go on overload and I will explode.

That would also be nice, I think. 

Monday, December 5, 2011

Pictures

I love taking pictures. I always have. I once thought about being a photographer, but then I couldn't fit the class into my schedule so I forgot about it, then I looked at real photographers' pictures and I realized I had absolutely no talent.

Then I married John.


This is Angelo:


He's John's step-dad. He is brilliant.

He may not be the best photographer, and he certainly doesn't get paid for it (though that's more personal choice than anything else), but he knows cameras and he knows sights. He's funny because he takes pictures most people won't think of, and some people don't like. He's a candid, behind-the scenes kind of guy:

This is actually one of my favorites from the wedding
He's given a camera to pretty much everyone in the family.
Let me rephrase that.
He has willingly permanently loaned all of his personal favorite cameras to everyone who has asked him for a camera to borrow for just a short while.
(we'll ignore the fact that he likely does this just so he can buy the newest best thing)


I, as it turns out, am no exception.
First, I sent out weekly family letters. Eventually pictures got mixed in. Eventually Angelo told me about some that he adored:



The food he liked because he loves taking pictures of food and Carol doesn't get it. I take waaay too many pictures of our meals. I tried stopping unless I had a real reason to want a picture. I've gotten better. Usually.

But Alma with his Jenga house? Sure it's a nice enough picture but there's nothing special about it. But both Angelo and my own hubby told me it was a great picture and that they love it. Hm.

Angelo told me I have a great eye. Well, ever since John got me a camera to document our life with I've worked on getting shots I like better, but I didn't know what a good eye meant. I still don't.

I was working for Angelo, selling camera stuff on eBay, and my family had our Reunion, so I borrowed the "work camera" for the week. He told me I could/should whenever I wanted to, but it's his expensive piece of equipment so I didn't want to cart it around all the time...but the family reunion was worth it.

And I came up with this:











These are pictures I can't get enough of. Especially the one with Ella and Michael on the frogs at the pool. That may be my favorite picture that I've ever taken. This last one with Ella on the lawn, too.

After the reunion I prepared to give Angelo back his prized possession. Except by then he'd bought a new and better prized possession and decided that I should keep this camera as long as I took lots of family photos.
I have taken lots of family photos.

However, I want to share more of my favorite pictures as my favorite pictures. I snap shots primarily to document my life, so I share shots to show that documentation. On occasion I'll share an obviously blurry picture because I love the moment it captured, even if my capturing of it wasn't excellent. So on occasion I'd like to share pictures because of the capturing as well as the moment.

Now, I have to warn you that I adore my nieces and nephews. So on occasion my obsession with them might cloud my view of what I really like about the photograph. Also, I may like something others may not see. But that's why this is my blog and I get to do what I want. :)

How to Bake a Pumpkin

 Start with a pumpkin. (If you want to)



Then give a crazy man a big knife.


Then tell him to be good or else.


Slice the cute little pumpkin in two.


Scrape out all the guts and seeds and give them to Brin so she can make amazing bread.


 Water them pumpkin so it can grow.


Bake the little bums.


Smooch the crazy guy (VITAL step!)


Dance with a puppy. (also vital)


Get pumpkin goo all over your fingers.


More, private! MORE! I said ALL over your fingers!



And then promptly forget all about taking pictures because your hands got gooey.


=D

Um, if you really want to know, google it. That's what I did.