John makes me laugh.
He's programming a chat application that he and I talked about inventing a few years ago. This is an early result:
Showing posts with label Funny. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Funny. Show all posts
Wednesday, March 19, 2014
Saturday, September 15, 2012
Adie and Ella Faces
I have the cutest nieces on the planet, who also happen to be absolutely hilarious.
The end.
Sunday, June 10, 2012
Jenny's Baby Girl eCard
My niece Jenny sent me this a couple days after we announced that I'm pregnant. I just remembered it.
My nieces make me happy.
Wednesday, May 16, 2012
Splenda Brownies
John decided to go off refined sugar.
Yeah...he doesn't eat it anymore.
He's not religious about it or anything, he still gets it here and there, but he won't eat sugary sweets and treats and junk. It's for his canker sores (you're supposed to be worried if you get 3 a year. He gets 3 a month), and so far it's worked! He's bitten his lip as often as ever for the past 2 1/2 months, but only once got infected and we couldn't really say that it was a canker sore -- or at least not nearly as bad as usual.
Anyway, he doesn't eat sugar.
Instead, he asked me to buy Splenda so that I can still make him all sorts of yummy treats that he misses so much. I've been reluctant (not only because Splenda is about 5 times as expensive as sugar), but on Sunday we gave in to his cravings and made some brownies.
Don't do it.
Splenda these days is supposed to be exchangeable straight over for sugar. Well maybe sometimes that works, but in baked goods it's a disaster. Splenda apparently doesn't absorb moisture the same as sugar, which they say means it just won't be as smooth.
Does not as smooth mean that my batter will be dough instead?
They also forgot to mention that all moisture will leak out of your treats while cooking and boil out on its own.
Basically, we fried our brownies, except that hardly any of the butter actually stayed in the brownies.
In the end, it did taste like my family's favorite brownie...except it also tasted like dusty dirt.
Yeah...he doesn't eat it anymore.
He's not religious about it or anything, he still gets it here and there, but he won't eat sugary sweets and treats and junk. It's for his canker sores (you're supposed to be worried if you get 3 a year. He gets 3 a month), and so far it's worked! He's bitten his lip as often as ever for the past 2 1/2 months, but only once got infected and we couldn't really say that it was a canker sore -- or at least not nearly as bad as usual.
Anyway, he doesn't eat sugar.
Instead, he asked me to buy Splenda so that I can still make him all sorts of yummy treats that he misses so much. I've been reluctant (not only because Splenda is about 5 times as expensive as sugar), but on Sunday we gave in to his cravings and made some brownies.
Don't do it.
Splenda these days is supposed to be exchangeable straight over for sugar. Well maybe sometimes that works, but in baked goods it's a disaster. Splenda apparently doesn't absorb moisture the same as sugar, which they say means it just won't be as smooth.
Does not as smooth mean that my batter will be dough instead?
They also forgot to mention that all moisture will leak out of your treats while cooking and boil out on its own.
Basically, we fried our brownies, except that hardly any of the butter actually stayed in the brownies.
In the end, it did taste like my family's favorite brownie...except it also tasted like dusty dirt.
Friday, February 17, 2012
Material Girl
Last weekend my dear, darling mother-in-law took me shopping. This is dangerous. My mother-in-law loves to buy, buy, buy, and I don't know how to say no, no, no.
Luckily I realize this, which means she hadn't taken me shopping in about a year and a half. But it was time.
I came to the conclusion that John's mom has bought me more clothing in the past 3 years than my own mother has in my entire life. This shouldn't be surprising since my mom knew how to say no for me, and most of my clothes growing up were second-hand (I am the youngest of ten belonging to an elementary school teacher, after all).
I don't want to get you the wrong idea. I love Carol and I love shopping with her. I had a blast spending time with a woman I adore. And let's face it, I'm not perfect; I thoroughly enjoy being spoiled rotten to the core.
Okay, hopefully I'm not rotten to the core.
But I am definitely spoiled.
Two hours in the dressing room and I am exactly
6 cardigans, 7 dresses, 10 shirts, 4 pairs of jeans (one coral colored), and 3 pairs of shoes more spoiled.
That's just attire.
And that's with me saying "I don't think so" a lot.
Oh, and see the heels on the right?
These:
That's right. I own sparkly heels.
This makes me muy happy.
I would never have bought them for myself. I just don't need them, so I simply wouldn't buy them. Carol, however, has no such inhibitions. I tried them on just to try them on, and she insisted I get them.
Isn't she cute?
I gave John a fashion show the next day:
This would make my Sarah Lynn proud (even if there is a lack of scarves)
I bought while with Carol something that John and I have been searching for: a comforter.
We painted our bedroom purple and cream and have been trying to find the right bed spread to go with it. We've found plenty of purple comforters, even in King size, and for a good price. But there's always been something wrong with them. Too "90's," too silver, too tan...so we had finally decided we might need to settle. But then the magically perfect one showed up.
Isn't it purdy?
We've been loving it.
I love our bed. I convinced John that we needed a King size. He thinks it makes us too far apart and he'd be perfectly happy with a double. Ugh. I'm glad I convinced him. Though our bed is somewhat...enormous. We got my brother's old bed frame when they switched, so it's free even if it's not what we would have picked out. But now we have our comforter and our purple sheets (several sets) and as soon as we get the all right pillows it will be perfect.
Almost there.
There is a vague point to all my ramblings here -- surprisingly enough.
As I skipped giddily around my house this week I realized how happy having nice things makes me. This is weird because I don't consider myself very material...and yet clearly I am. So I thought about it more.
Yes, I am a material person. I value material things.
Material things give me happiness, even lasting (time-wise) happiness.
My huge house continues to make me happy. My painted walls continue to make me happy. My gadget-stocked kitchen continues to make me happy. My collection of books continues to make me happy. Some of my random purchases from the dollar store continue to make me happy.
However, my happiness does not hinge on material things. I am quite happy without all these things, and was before I had them. All of these things are just added bonuses on an already wonderful life. That's how I see them. And that's why I think my life is amazing.
I have everything I could need: a wonderful husband, loving and lovable family and friends, my basic needs taken care of
I also have everything I could want: A loving and successful marriage, a home of our own, time to spend with those I care for, financial security, health, the ability to learn and grow,
Then I get all these extras: A house we could never outgrow, an overflowing wardrobe (with a closet that makes it seem small), a gorgeous kitchen, the money to buy most whimsical desires, a cute puppy to keep me company
People who know me know I am a very happy person. I always have been. But I'm pretty sure everyone else would be too if they had my life. My life simply rocks.
Yet, that's not really what makes me happy.
Choosing to be happy makes me happy.
And I choose to love the small things.
That's just attire.
And that's with me saying "I don't think so" a lot.
Oh, and see the heels on the right?
These:
This makes me muy happy.
I would never have bought them for myself. I just don't need them, so I simply wouldn't buy them. Carol, however, has no such inhibitions. I tried them on just to try them on, and she insisted I get them.
Isn't she cute?
I gave John a fashion show the next day:
I bought while with Carol something that John and I have been searching for: a comforter.
We painted our bedroom purple and cream and have been trying to find the right bed spread to go with it. We've found plenty of purple comforters, even in King size, and for a good price. But there's always been something wrong with them. Too "90's," too silver, too tan...so we had finally decided we might need to settle. But then the magically perfect one showed up.
We've been loving it.
I love our bed. I convinced John that we needed a King size. He thinks it makes us too far apart and he'd be perfectly happy with a double. Ugh. I'm glad I convinced him. Though our bed is somewhat...enormous. We got my brother's old bed frame when they switched, so it's free even if it's not what we would have picked out. But now we have our comforter and our purple sheets (several sets) and as soon as we get the all right pillows it will be perfect.
There is a vague point to all my ramblings here -- surprisingly enough.
As I skipped giddily around my house this week I realized how happy having nice things makes me. This is weird because I don't consider myself very material...and yet clearly I am. So I thought about it more.
Yes, I am a material person. I value material things.
Material things give me happiness, even lasting (time-wise) happiness.
My huge house continues to make me happy. My painted walls continue to make me happy. My gadget-stocked kitchen continues to make me happy. My collection of books continues to make me happy. Some of my random purchases from the dollar store continue to make me happy.
However, my happiness does not hinge on material things. I am quite happy without all these things, and was before I had them. All of these things are just added bonuses on an already wonderful life. That's how I see them. And that's why I think my life is amazing.
I have everything I could need: a wonderful husband, loving and lovable family and friends, my basic needs taken care of
I also have everything I could want: A loving and successful marriage, a home of our own, time to spend with those I care for, financial security, health, the ability to learn and grow,
Then I get all these extras: A house we could never outgrow, an overflowing wardrobe (with a closet that makes it seem small), a gorgeous kitchen, the money to buy most whimsical desires, a cute puppy to keep me company
People who know me know I am a very happy person. I always have been. But I'm pretty sure everyone else would be too if they had my life. My life simply rocks.
Yet, that's not really what makes me happy.
Choosing to be happy makes me happy.
And I choose to love the small things.
Friday, January 27, 2012
Banning Baby Bandwagon
I'm pretty sure at least 15 people I know have announced in the past week that they(/their significant other) are pregnant, or have announced what the gender of their coming baby is, or have actually had the baby. Add another week or two before that and the numbers increase. I'm pretty sure at least a 1/3 of my facebook friends(/their significant others) are either pregnant or just had a baby.
I can't post this on facebook because then my family will jump on it and assume I am pregnant and I'm not in the mood to combat all that. (And yes, that means I am not pregnant)
The point is, why on earth did everyone have to make it a bandwagon? I hate bandwagons.
Okay, not really, I just hate it when something I want to do becomes a bandwagon. Because I hate jumping on bandwagons. It takes all the fun out of it. Not that I have to be original -- I just don't want to be just like everyone else.
Except really...having a baby is no fad. I know I'm being silly. Anyone who falls into the category determined in the first paragraph would tell me that the third paragraph has nothing to do with them. And it doesn't, really. No one intended to all get together and have babies this year. (At least I hope not.)
But if John and I decide to never have children, I'm still blaming it on the sudden abnormal increase of baby-ness in my acquaintances lately.
I can't post this on facebook because then my family will jump on it and assume I am pregnant and I'm not in the mood to combat all that. (And yes, that means I am not pregnant)
The point is, why on earth did everyone have to make it a bandwagon? I hate bandwagons.
Okay, not really, I just hate it when something I want to do becomes a bandwagon. Because I hate jumping on bandwagons. It takes all the fun out of it. Not that I have to be original -- I just don't want to be just like everyone else.
Except really...having a baby is no fad. I know I'm being silly. Anyone who falls into the category determined in the first paragraph would tell me that the third paragraph has nothing to do with them. And it doesn't, really. No one intended to all get together and have babies this year. (At least I hope not.)
But if John and I decide to never have children, I'm still blaming it on the sudden abnormal increase of baby-ness in my acquaintances lately.
Thursday, December 15, 2011
Not Not Crush
John confessed something to me the other day.
Success!
It's about time!
Thank you witty, amiable skank!
(only because of the hilarious though inappropriate Easy A. It's actually a compliment.)
"Quick! What is the actress's name who plays the reporter in the Hope?" (he means The Help)
"Emma Stone" (saved by Elise)
"Thank you! I certainly do not not have a crush on her."
Me to Amanda: "What a jerk I married! Boo!!" (teasingly, of course)
"Well I do not not have a crush on Hugh Jackman."
(I wish I had an iPhone)Success!
Thank you witty, amiable skank!
(only because of the hilarious though inappropriate Easy A. It's actually a compliment.)
Monday, December 5, 2011
How to Bake a Pumpkin
Start with a pumpkin. (If you want to)
Scrape out all the guts and seeds and give them to Brin so she can make amazing bread.
Water them pumpkin so it can grow.
Bake the little bums.
Smooch the crazy guy (VITAL step!)
Dance with a puppy. (also vital)
Get pumpkin goo all over your fingers.
More, private! MORE! I said ALL over your fingers!
And then promptly forget all about taking pictures because your hands got gooey.
=D
Um, if you really want to know, google it. That's what I did.
Then give a crazy man a big knife.
Then tell him to be good or else.
Slice the cute little pumpkin in two.
Scrape out all the guts and seeds and give them to Brin so she can make amazing bread.
Water them pumpkin so it can grow.
Bake the little bums.
Smooch the crazy guy (VITAL step!)
Dance with a puppy. (also vital)
Get pumpkin goo all over your fingers.
More, private! MORE! I said ALL over your fingers!
And then promptly forget all about taking pictures because your hands got gooey.
=D
Um, if you really want to know, google it. That's what I did.
Saturday, October 29, 2011
I am a Horrible Aunt.
So, on facebook earlier this week this happened:
So...this is interesting because I am also friends with this person:
And so when the first Jennifer requested my facebook friendship, I was confused. I figured it was the second Jennifer, but I was already friends with her. She is my sister-in-law's sister. She's a handful of years short of being old enough to be my mother and she's just the type of person you don't see running around making multiple facebook pages -- or even spending all that much time on the one she already has. So the back of my mind was confused, but I overlooked it. Especially that cute but cheesy picture of the wolves.
Then this happened:
Which is weird because this was into the ""Lynn Nelson Family" group, defined as:
Lynn is my Daddy.
So my brother adding my sister-in-law's sister made no sense.
Then it hit me.
...
But it's okay. I just never refer to my darling Jenny Ann as "Jennifer Christensen."
That's awkward.
So it's natural that that combination would not make me realize that my Jenny Ann got a facebook account the day she turned 13.
Also it's okay, because John said that when he saw
He thought of
Whose name is not nor ever has been "Jennifer." (at least we're pretty sure)
So...this is interesting because I am also friends with this person:
And so when the first Jennifer requested my facebook friendship, I was confused. I figured it was the second Jennifer, but I was already friends with her. She is my sister-in-law's sister. She's a handful of years short of being old enough to be my mother and she's just the type of person you don't see running around making multiple facebook pages -- or even spending all that much time on the one she already has. So the back of my mind was confused, but I overlooked it. Especially that cute but cheesy picture of the wolves.
Then this happened:
Which is weird because this was into the ""Lynn Nelson Family" group, defined as:
Lynn is my Daddy.
So my brother adding my sister-in-law's sister made no sense.
Then it hit me.
...
But it's okay. I just never refer to my darling Jenny Ann as "Jennifer Christensen."
That's awkward.
So it's natural that that combination would not make me realize that my Jenny Ann got a facebook account the day she turned 13.
Also it's okay, because John said that when he saw
He thought of
Whose name is not nor ever has been "Jennifer." (at least we're pretty sure)
Wednesday, October 26, 2011
Anti-bacterial
I am sitting in class.
I am blogging from an iPod.
I am blogging about a "pocket-bac" hand sanitizer.
I was early for class, so I sat outside. I was bored. How did I entertain myself?
Did you know that if you turn a small plastic bottle around and around that a small bubble forms and attaches and detaches from the main bubble?
It made me happy.
The bubble is now squished out.
The end.
I am blogging from an iPod.
I am blogging about a "pocket-bac" hand sanitizer.
 |
| courtesy |
I was early for class, so I sat outside. I was bored. How did I entertain myself?
Did you know that if you turn a small plastic bottle around and around that a small bubble forms and attaches and detaches from the main bubble?
It made me happy.
The bubble is now squished out.
The end.
Wednesday, September 28, 2011
Monday, September 26, 2011
Random PRTSC
Sometimes, I take a screen shot
(you have a little button that says "PRTSC")
because my life is hilarious.
...and my life exists on the computer?
Of course I save the hilarious bits, but they're only so hilarious if I don't share them.
So I am going to share
Because they are hilarious.
(you have a little button that says "PRTSC")
because my life is hilarious.
...and my life exists on the computer?
Of course I save the hilarious bits, but they're only so hilarious if I don't share them.
So I am going to share
Because they are hilarious.
Crime Scene Hot Shoe
Am I the only one who thinks this picture looks like it was taken straight from a crime scene?
Facebook Anniversary Reminder
Thank you, Facebook. I had no idea.
John Smack Brin
I swear, officer, I just ran into a firewall!
Volatile Savings
Disclaimer:
I have never been to a crime scene.
I know when my Anniversary is.
John does not beat me. (physically or at games :P)
We are fairly smart with our finances.
Sunday, September 4, 2011
Dull Family Moments
Every month on the first Sunday we Nelsons have a "Family Chat."
I love the idea of having this time to talk with all my family, getting caught up with more than just the "weekly" letters only a couple of us send out. It's different to have a conversation, even electronically, instead of just a general "here ya go" of lives.
Unfortunately, our chats are not as successful as I envision. This has led to much discussion between John and I as to what could fix that. I'm not here to go on and on about solutions or vent about problems.
Unfortunately, our chats are not as successful as I envision. This has led to much discussion between John and I as to what could fix that. I'm not here to go on and on about solutions or vent about problems.
I'm here because I think I'm hilarious, and I think my family's reactions are even more hilarious.
Yup. Nothing.
Ah. There we go.
Ah. There we go.
Pigtails.
Sometimes John squeezes and pokes and bites me.
Today he compared it to an elementary school boy who pulls on a girl's pigtails.
"I just like you so much. I have all this energy, I can't contain it and I don't know how else to let it out.
"I like you so much!!!"
:)
I like him, too.
Today he compared it to an elementary school boy who pulls on a girl's pigtails.
"I just like you so much. I have all this energy, I can't contain it and I don't know how else to let it out.
"I like you so much!!!"
:)
I like him, too.
Thursday, September 1, 2011
Paradise Permeating
I've talked about my obsession with lilacs before:
Day 12: Lilacs
Day 23: 15 Facts
Day 1: 15 Facts by Johnny
So I don't think I have to explain back story. :)
In the second link it shows a picture of some of the lilac-smelling things I own. Despite my desire to smell lilacs all the time, I have purposefully procrastinated using most of them. Why? Because I didn't want to waste them on places that simply didn't deserve this divine smell.
Well, I'm in my own home. I've had one of my oil-heater thingies set up in the front room for a while, but I didn't have any unscented votive candles to use (I have plenty of lilac smelling votive candles :P). I bought a bag of tealights (discounted!) the other day so...go.
I got distracted and temporarily forgot about it.
Then I smelt this absolutely heavenly amazing smell, and I was confused. I've been too busy since I got home from school (ending in Zumba) to shower yet, so there's no way it was me. Even my perfume from this morning has faded. I didn't get it.
Then I did.
And I'm in paradise.
I am SO glad that it works. I've been worried that none of them would work since the house is big and there is a lot of open air to permeate. But it does it well. And I am happy.
Day 12: Lilacs
Day 23: 15 Facts
Day 1: 15 Facts by Johnny
So I don't think I have to explain back story. :)
In the second link it shows a picture of some of the lilac-smelling things I own. Despite my desire to smell lilacs all the time, I have purposefully procrastinated using most of them. Why? Because I didn't want to waste them on places that simply didn't deserve this divine smell.
Well, I'm in my own home. I've had one of my oil-heater thingies set up in the front room for a while, but I didn't have any unscented votive candles to use (I have plenty of lilac smelling votive candles :P). I bought a bag of tealights (discounted!) the other day so...go.
I got distracted and temporarily forgot about it.
Then I smelt this absolutely heavenly amazing smell, and I was confused. I've been too busy since I got home from school (ending in Zumba) to shower yet, so there's no way it was me. Even my perfume from this morning has faded. I didn't get it.
Then I did.
And I'm in paradise.
I am SO glad that it works. I've been worried that none of them would work since the house is big and there is a lot of open air to permeate. But it does it well. And I am happy.
I love this.
I started school last week. I was apprehensive, worried, nervous, scared, and bracing myself for drudgery.
I was also dead excited to have a life.
I could bore you with the details, but right now I want to focus on the things that are making emotions pulse through me.
I love that the classes at SLCC are small and personable.
I love half of my teachers, and I like the other half.
I love that I can raise my hand and participate.
I love that I feel like for once in my school career I will be actually learning something.
I love that most of me is committed to my classes instead of the normal "whatevs" approach.
I love that I am honestly excited about every single subject.
I love that I feel motivated.
I love that I actually understand the organization of each of my classes.
I love that I am here because I want to be, and no other reason.
I love that the government is paying me to go to school.
I love that I can get up every day.
I love that I come home and still have energy even though I'm physically exhausted and hungry.
I love that my Sarah Lynn will be in my Institute class. We haven't had a real class to be together in for years.
I love that I saw my wonderful good friend Stephen today.
I love that I got to share with Stephen in Institute, and that talking about religion didn't leave us both frustrated.
I love that I know people.
I love that I feel confident enough that my outgoing side is bursting out.
I love my Religious Diversities class. I don't know how it could be more perfect.
I love that I know I will stay on top of assignments.
I love that I'm actually excited to do my assignments.
I love that I already have a topic for all of my English papers.
I love that I get to write about something I'm passionate about, while learning more about it.
I love that I'm busy out of my mind.
I love that I'm burning a million calories and working out my leg muscles like crazy in Zumba.
I love that I'm excited to read my textbooks...perhaps cover to cover.
I love love love that I became friends with Aura Kenney today.
I love that Aura and I talked for at least an hour and a half straight and it was thoroughly enjoyable, and slightly addicting.
I love a million other things.
I love that each of the above were things I thought about, and got happy because of, before I wrote this.
Life freaking rocks.
I was also dead excited to have a life.
I could bore you with the details, but right now I want to focus on the things that are making emotions pulse through me.
I love that the classes at SLCC are small and personable.
I love half of my teachers, and I like the other half.
I love that I can raise my hand and participate.
I love that I feel like for once in my school career I will be actually learning something.
I love that most of me is committed to my classes instead of the normal "whatevs" approach.
I love that I am honestly excited about every single subject.
I love that I feel motivated.
I love that I actually understand the organization of each of my classes.
I love that I am here because I want to be, and no other reason.
I love that the government is paying me to go to school.
I love that I can get up every day.
I love that I come home and still have energy even though I'm physically exhausted and hungry.
I love that my Sarah Lynn will be in my Institute class. We haven't had a real class to be together in for years.
I love that I saw my wonderful good friend Stephen today.
I love that I got to share with Stephen in Institute, and that talking about religion didn't leave us both frustrated.
I love that I know people.
I love that I feel confident enough that my outgoing side is bursting out.
I love my Religious Diversities class. I don't know how it could be more perfect.
I love that I know I will stay on top of assignments.
I love that I'm actually excited to do my assignments.
I love that I already have a topic for all of my English papers.
I love that I get to write about something I'm passionate about, while learning more about it.
I love that I'm busy out of my mind.
I love that I'm burning a million calories and working out my leg muscles like crazy in Zumba.
I love that I'm excited to read my textbooks...perhaps cover to cover.
I love love love that I became friends with Aura Kenney today.
I love that Aura and I talked for at least an hour and a half straight and it was thoroughly enjoyable, and slightly addicting.
I love a million other things.
I love that each of the above were things I thought about, and got happy because of, before I wrote this.
Life freaking rocks.
Wednesday, August 24, 2011
I AM a Utah Resident, Thank You!
Once upon a time there was a girl.
She was a basic, boring, run-of-the-mill, white-trash, Utah Molly Mormon.
She was a basic, boring, run-of-the-mill, white-trash, Utah Molly Mormon.
[Okay, so maybe she just lived in white-trash West Valley]
She grew up in Utah her entire life. Her parents had both grown up in Utah, as had her parents' parents, and so forth. She had never left the state for more than a day until she was 12. She had never even left the country at all until she was 19.
Then one day she decided to stop being uninteresting, and went to live in Mexico for four months.
Except it really wasn't that interesting. She just got married and her husband toted her around while he did cool things like a study abroad in a foreign Ivy League-equivalent University.
Then life settled down a bit and she decided that she should go back to school now that she wasn't moving every couple months.
When applying to go to a cute little college called SLCC, she was asked if she had lived anywhere other than Utah anytime in the last 12 months. Well, she considered herself living elsewhere, but that is entirely subjective and they certainly didn't give her enough information to tell her which was technically right. But, thinking that either way it shouldn't be a problem because she was, of course, a Utah Resident, she decided to give the benefit of the doubt and click "yes."
"Thanks for submitting all the information about you in the world. We've decided that you are humble enough to get into our prestigious poor starter college. Congratulations! Oh, and by the way, you're not a Utah Resident so you have to pay 1,000,000 times what everyone else pays."
Bah Humbug.
If she's not a Utah Resident, then pray tell, what is she a Resident of????
The state of Utah considers her a Resident, as they had no problem updating her Drivers' License. Why does the school not consider her a Resident?
Because of one simple drop down menu that could be considered a mistake, but was certainly taken simply on the girl's word.
So, what does she have to do? She has to spend way too much time trying to figure out how to fix it, and then even more time actually trying to fix it. Then, when she gets all her papers in and everything to prove that she is, indeed, a Utah Resident, what do they ask for?
Proof that she was gone at all.
Excuse me??!?? If you can't prove that I'm gone, WHY DO I HAVE TO PROVE THAT IT DOESN'T COUNT!?!
The best part?
There ISN'T any proof that she was gone.
The ONLY proof that she was in Mexico for any amount of time, let alone for four months, is either total personal correspondence (which could all be complete bull for all they care), or a tourist visa.
A TOURIST visa, people! A tourist visa proves that she was a TOURIST, not a RESIDENT!!!
Also, because of complications with idiotic, stupid, ridiculous, conniving, thieving, corrupted Mexicans (not that all Mexicans are that, but the ones encountered for this purpose definitely were), the tourist visa wasn't even legitimate or legal.
AND if we had driven back into the US instead of flown, neither the Mexican nor the US government would have any idea or record that she was ever in Mexico at all. Possibly they still don't. That last guy was probably all of those adjectives as well.
Oh, and another great part:
What if she lived in a different state, instead of a different country?
There literally would be absolutely NO hard proof that she was gone. Ever.
Grumble.
Luckily, she is now considered a Utah Resident by all parties.
Thank you.
Thursday, July 28, 2011
I Should Be Packing...
We are going camping tomorrow until Sunday. To quote my facebook:
"Camping alllllll weekend! Hello Torrey Pines, dirt, kiddies, worries over food, a soon-to-be frustrated sister-in-law, lots of pictures, and some good times. Goodbye my normal world of glowing rectangles. Except the handful we will bring with us..."
Sleeepy...
I just took out the garbage. It's strange to have it full of garbage instead of weeds. The recycling is also full. I said I just took out, but actually Johnny and I fought over it. We compromised with me taking out one and him taking out the other. We didn't fight over the work, but the service. If that makes sense.
Johnny has been super good to me...always, but especially lately. Today he came home from work and insisted that I needed a relaxing evening. Baby, I may have had the supposed two-year-old terror that is Carson (who was practically an angel) for two days, but really I've just been watching Heroes all day. Okay, so I did that while finally getting down the insurmountable mound of dishes, doing the laundry, and dancing around Carsy, but still. I'm a lazy bum, or I feel like it. I don't need no relaxation. But the thought was nice.
Regardless of his desire, we both ended up..where? Staring at our glowing rectangles. I may have made a necessary and wonderful choice to marry a techie, but it means the computer is an addiction that both of us crave, even when we've had too much. :)
He just wanted to finish a couple things from work, and since he was on it I had to get on it. :) So my excuse is lame. John's isn't, actually. He never does work from home, except the one time he was supposed to. I don't blame him this time. He took the holiday on Monday and he's taking a vacation day tomorrow so that we can go camping. So he's only had three days of work and his project is due soon and they're nowhere near done.
I'm glad hubs loves his job. Everyone needs to, but so few do.
Haha, so while he was doing that I went searching for something to do. I've never been good at web surfing. I usually just go to my 4 regular sites about a million times, waiting for something interesting to happen. Facebook is really not that entertaining, but I'm addicted, regardless. My calendar is not going to suddenly get packed with super amazing things to do no matter how long I stare at it. I wait around for a juicy good letter in my inbox, but when they come I'm too lazy to read them. Netflix will always have something to entertain me, which is horrible because then I become a zombie.
So that leaves Blogger. There's usually a new post from someone every day, but that takes about 2 minutes to read and I'm done. I could catch up on all the posts I've been meaning to finish...but that sounds like work.
This.is.my.life.
Anyhow, today I was mindlessly clicking and found myself on my favorite blogger's site. I don't know her, but she's hilarious. I purposely do not follow people I don't know because then I really could be sucked away forever reading about things that have nothing to do with me. But she followed me first, and then I got sucked in.
Anyhow (again), I was wondering how she started her blog, so I went to the beginning...and kept going. And 2 1/2 hours went by before John was finally done with what he wanted to do so I stopped.
I am now nostalgic. And a little disoriented. She's still in High School and I realized that she was 15 when she started the blog, which started me thinking of when I was 15 which was six years ago. (How did I get so old so fast?) And I started thinking of things I was saying and doing back then. Holly and I were best friends, boy crazy, bored out of our minds, counting down the days to our birthdays, writing notes constantly...
those were the days.
Seriously, High School is SO fun. You get to see friends every day, you're always doing stuff, summer doesn't feel like a waste of time when you don't do anything, you don't have to worry about anything but yourself. All except that annoying thing that is school.
Now I'm all grown up and married. We own a house. I have housework to do and I'm not getting paid for it or fighting/avoiding my mom about it. There's no such thing as summer break, which means when I'm a lazy bum my life is a lazy bum. We live "out in the boonies" so I can't go do stuff with friends. Even if I lived closer to friends, all our schedules don't mesh so spontaneity is a thing of the past.
What I would give to be spontaneous.
Blahhhhhh...I need sleep. I don't want to.
Puppy is with Grandma for the weekend. It is seriously weird not having my shadow. I'm sure she misses me more. Silly dog.
I put up stuff on the walls today. It made my house a home, even with the half painted walls. I'm happy :)
My laundry room is now crowded and I know John hates that so I was worried. But he likes it, and said that's what laundry/mud rooms are for. To be filled with all the junk you need that isn't for show. So yay :) I now have my big cork board, our big white board, a clock (it's green to match the someday-to-be green walls), a mail basket, a calendar, and my note roll/corkboard/key hook thingie, not to mention three doors, one of which is covered in magnets, all in the 6x6ft mudroom side of the laundry room. I'm in love. I need my crowded spaces in this spacious home. There's too much emptiness here.
I have the Harry Potter theme song stuck in my head.
We're still not packed.
Funny how that happens. Me not packing gets us still not packed. Unless John's been working on it...that's nice.
I have the best Johnny in the world!!
Even if he didn't do any packing.
"Camping alllllll weekend! Hello Torrey Pines, dirt, kiddies, worries over food, a soon-to-be frustrated sister-in-law, lots of pictures, and some good times. Goodbye my normal world of glowing rectangles. Except the handful we will bring with us..."
Sleeepy...
I just took out the garbage. It's strange to have it full of garbage instead of weeds. The recycling is also full. I said I just took out, but actually Johnny and I fought over it. We compromised with me taking out one and him taking out the other. We didn't fight over the work, but the service. If that makes sense.
Johnny has been super good to me...always, but especially lately. Today he came home from work and insisted that I needed a relaxing evening. Baby, I may have had the supposed two-year-old terror that is Carson (who was practically an angel) for two days, but really I've just been watching Heroes all day. Okay, so I did that while finally getting down the insurmountable mound of dishes, doing the laundry, and dancing around Carsy, but still. I'm a lazy bum, or I feel like it. I don't need no relaxation. But the thought was nice.
Regardless of his desire, we both ended up..where? Staring at our glowing rectangles. I may have made a necessary and wonderful choice to marry a techie, but it means the computer is an addiction that both of us crave, even when we've had too much. :)
He just wanted to finish a couple things from work, and since he was on it I had to get on it. :) So my excuse is lame. John's isn't, actually. He never does work from home, except the one time he was supposed to. I don't blame him this time. He took the holiday on Monday and he's taking a vacation day tomorrow so that we can go camping. So he's only had three days of work and his project is due soon and they're nowhere near done.
I'm glad hubs loves his job. Everyone needs to, but so few do.
Haha, so while he was doing that I went searching for something to do. I've never been good at web surfing. I usually just go to my 4 regular sites about a million times, waiting for something interesting to happen. Facebook is really not that entertaining, but I'm addicted, regardless. My calendar is not going to suddenly get packed with super amazing things to do no matter how long I stare at it. I wait around for a juicy good letter in my inbox, but when they come I'm too lazy to read them. Netflix will always have something to entertain me, which is horrible because then I become a zombie.
So that leaves Blogger. There's usually a new post from someone every day, but that takes about 2 minutes to read and I'm done. I could catch up on all the posts I've been meaning to finish...but that sounds like work.
This.is.my.life.
Anyhow, today I was mindlessly clicking and found myself on my favorite blogger's site. I don't know her, but she's hilarious. I purposely do not follow people I don't know because then I really could be sucked away forever reading about things that have nothing to do with me. But she followed me first, and then I got sucked in.
Anyhow (again), I was wondering how she started her blog, so I went to the beginning...and kept going. And 2 1/2 hours went by before John was finally done with what he wanted to do so I stopped.
I am now nostalgic. And a little disoriented. She's still in High School and I realized that she was 15 when she started the blog, which started me thinking of when I was 15 which was six years ago. (How did I get so old so fast?) And I started thinking of things I was saying and doing back then. Holly and I were best friends, boy crazy, bored out of our minds, counting down the days to our birthdays, writing notes constantly...
those were the days.
Seriously, High School is SO fun. You get to see friends every day, you're always doing stuff, summer doesn't feel like a waste of time when you don't do anything, you don't have to worry about anything but yourself. All except that annoying thing that is school.
Now I'm all grown up and married. We own a house. I have housework to do and I'm not getting paid for it or fighting/avoiding my mom about it. There's no such thing as summer break, which means when I'm a lazy bum my life is a lazy bum. We live "out in the boonies" so I can't go do stuff with friends. Even if I lived closer to friends, all our schedules don't mesh so spontaneity is a thing of the past.
What I would give to be spontaneous.
Blahhhhhh...I need sleep. I don't want to.
Puppy is with Grandma for the weekend. It is seriously weird not having my shadow. I'm sure she misses me more. Silly dog.
I put up stuff on the walls today. It made my house a home, even with the half painted walls. I'm happy :)
My laundry room is now crowded and I know John hates that so I was worried. But he likes it, and said that's what laundry/mud rooms are for. To be filled with all the junk you need that isn't for show. So yay :) I now have my big cork board, our big white board, a clock (it's green to match the someday-to-be green walls), a mail basket, a calendar, and my note roll/corkboard/key hook thingie, not to mention three doors, one of which is covered in magnets, all in the 6x6ft mudroom side of the laundry room. I'm in love. I need my crowded spaces in this spacious home. There's too much emptiness here.
I have the Harry Potter theme song stuck in my head.
We're still not packed.
Funny how that happens. Me not packing gets us still not packed. Unless John's been working on it...that's nice.
I have the best Johnny in the world!!
Even if he didn't do any packing.
Tuesday, July 19, 2011
Thursday, June 30, 2011
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